1. It's Friday again, and super warm outside but, unfortunately, also raining. ON FRIDAY!! So, as you can imagine, it is very loud and crazy in my house. I am coping by ignoring the loud children and blogging. Don't judge.
2. This week I did my taxes, paid some taxes, and paid a whopping bill from Olivia's tonsillectomy. And even though we are still financially tight, I feel like we are caught up. Like I can pay bills when they come in instead of waiting for pay day. Which is a good feeling.
3. We got our March newsletter from the Agency today, which basically indicated that the tables have completely turned there. When we signed on late last Summer, they were requiring adoptive families to be open to a whole lot of things that some families aren't necessarily open to...open adoption, more racial diversity, drug exposure, etc. This was because they were trying to limit their adoptive families because they were heavy on families and light on birthparents. Now it is opposite. They are easing up on requirements of adoptive parent openness and allowing them to be more specific about their preferences just to get more families to sign on. They are now heavy on birthparents and light on adoptive parents. We would be pretty open about birthparent situations and racial mixes regardless of the rules. And yet, we still don't have a single match. I am baffled by this. I'm wondering if we are secretly ugly and no one is bothering to tell us.
4. Olivia fell on the playground on Monday and busted her chin open. She is sporting a chin full of surgical glue and a waterproof band-aid. She says it itches (and I'm sure it does) but so far she has been healing well and hasn't messed with it much. She had to miss swimming lessons this week because of it. Luckily, the warm weather and DST have made evenings more fun even without lessons to occupy our time.
5. We inherited a basketball goal from some neighbors who moved and didn't want to take it along. It's one of those rolling things that we move out onto the center of the driveway in the evening so Joe and Olivia can play. I took a walk the other night while they played on the driveway and caught a glimpse of them enjoying themselves as I was walking back home. It seemed a perfect tableau of suburban America...father and child shooting some hoops on the driveway. Or maybe that's just Indiana. Anyway, it made for a sweet portrait of our life right now.
6. March has been super busy. We are involved in some ministries that are...intense right now. Meetings and recruitments and motivating people and such. It's a lot of work, but we keep plugging on. When we are NOT busy with ministries, we are busy with the house. Spring projects kind of snuck up on us, what with the weather turning warm a full six weeks early. Need to think about painting our outside doors soon...before it gets hot.
7. This weekend, my family is gathering for a local niece's first birthday. I am very excited to hang out with my far-away family...especially the young cousins Olivia loves so much. I have birthday gifts to give to the twins, who had their far-away party last week, and an advance first-communion gift to give to our goddaughter. The boys' gifts were hand-made by me...tool belts with their initials. Molly is getting some hand-made (but not by me) first-communion jewelry. I love giving gifts!
Showing posts with label Life's frustrations. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Life's frustrations. Show all posts
Friday, March 16, 2012
Thursday, February 23, 2012
Scattered thoughts and new look
I got a little nutty yesterday (or maybe it was Tuesday...this week is running together already) and started messing with my blog. I have wanted a new title for awhile. And then I hated the font on the old template and, well, you can see the results of the rest. After all the years I've been blogging, you'd think I'd just make the leap and pay for an actual web address instead of the blogspot thing, but alas...I am thrifty. Especially now.
Yesterday is a bit of a blur. I tend toward the hypoglycemic end of the spectrum, so fasting days are a little difficult. I feel great for awhile after a meal, but then as the next meal time approaches, my brain starts to fog up. Especially since I'm ALSO de-carbing. It's good in the long run because my blood sugar remains more constant for longer periods of time on fats and proteins and veggies instead of quick carbs, but it was kind of bad planning to binge on sugars and grains on Tuesday and then expect to fast at all on Wednesday. Yeah.
I overdosed on caffeine this morning with TWO cups of coffee (yes, I'm a lightweight), so now my mind is racing. I'm thinking I'll get my fabric scraps out and start a project like this today just to keep my hands and mind busy so I don't start obsessing. When I sit still without something to do for too long, I start thinking too hard about our next adoption and wondering when we will be chosen by a birthmom, and that is not terribly productive.
I'd work on one of the many presentations we have to prepare for March (Engaged Encounter and NFP ministries), but again, racing mind. Maybe it will slow down by this afternoon. I'd love to get outside for a bit. The sun is out and Spring is on my mind.
Happy Lent!
Yesterday is a bit of a blur. I tend toward the hypoglycemic end of the spectrum, so fasting days are a little difficult. I feel great for awhile after a meal, but then as the next meal time approaches, my brain starts to fog up. Especially since I'm ALSO de-carbing. It's good in the long run because my blood sugar remains more constant for longer periods of time on fats and proteins and veggies instead of quick carbs, but it was kind of bad planning to binge on sugars and grains on Tuesday and then expect to fast at all on Wednesday. Yeah.
I overdosed on caffeine this morning with TWO cups of coffee (yes, I'm a lightweight), so now my mind is racing. I'm thinking I'll get my fabric scraps out and start a project like this today just to keep my hands and mind busy so I don't start obsessing. When I sit still without something to do for too long, I start thinking too hard about our next adoption and wondering when we will be chosen by a birthmom, and that is not terribly productive.
I'd work on one of the many presentations we have to prepare for March (Engaged Encounter and NFP ministries), but again, racing mind. Maybe it will slow down by this afternoon. I'd love to get outside for a bit. The sun is out and Spring is on my mind.
Happy Lent!
Monday, January 23, 2012
Because blogging keeps me awake
I had three hours of sleep last night. I'm running on caffeine and sheer willpower. I can barely put a full sentence together. It is by the Grace of God that I haven't strangled anyone this morning.
Last night was bad. There was this awful line of severe weather with high winds and tornado threats moving through, and Joe was out in it picking up a conference participant at the airport. So, obviously I couldn't really sleep until I knew he was home safe. Then I was up another 45 minutes waiting for the heavy part of the storm to pass. Thunder is annoying. High winds, though, make it impossible for me to sleep.
I was just drifting off when Olivia woke up (after the bulk of the thunder had already passed) and said that the storm scared her. So I went to lay with her in her bed. She proceeded to toss and turn, wide awake, for the next three hours. At that point, I was so tired that I was sobbing. I put her on the couch and turned on the TV at 3:45 a.m., resigned to the fact that if she could be entertained by the TV, at least that meant I could get a couple of hours of sleep before I had to get up and face the day. Normally, TV in the middle of the night would NOT be an option, but IT WAS 3:45 A.M. AND I HAD NOT YET HAD ANY SLEEP. I was desperate.
Of course my desperation and sobbing woke my husband, who had been asleep about three hours at that point. He took matters into his own hands, trying to get Olivia to calm down and fall asleep. He finally succeeded about two hours later, only to have her wake up about an hour after THAT with a bad dream.
Needless to say, we are both very, very tired today. And Olivia gets to take a nap this afternoon, whether she wants to or not.
Recovery-wise, things are going smoothly. Olivia still complains of sore throat when she eats something scratchy, but otherwise she is acting and playing normally. Where she was breathing so loudly before surgery that we could hear her on the opposite end of the house, doors closed and TV on, she now breathes so quietly that we have to watch for the rising and falling of her chest to know she is breathing at all.
All this has translated to better overall sleep as long as nothing wakes her prematurely. That part could be a problem. Even after just six hours (of her usual eleven) of sleep last night, she was refreshed enough to stare wide-eyed at the ceiling for the better part of the night.
The other thing I've noticed is that she hasn't had a bedwetting problem since the surgery. She developed that problem around this time last year, when we started noticing her apnea symptoms. It is really too soon to tell since she was so dehydrated for several days following surgery, but she has been "normal" in fluid intake for the last few days, and still she stays dry all night. I'm thinking maybe she was too tired to get up and potty before. So I'm hoping that trend continues.
The huge downside is that she seems to have developed an allergic reaction to all food dyes. Everything is making her break out. Today is the first day in a week that we haven't dosed her with bena*dryl. We aren't sure that dyes are the cause, but it seems to be the common denominator. We are hoping that avoidance of all dyes takes care of THAT problem.
I am so, so tired.
Last night was bad. There was this awful line of severe weather with high winds and tornado threats moving through, and Joe was out in it picking up a conference participant at the airport. So, obviously I couldn't really sleep until I knew he was home safe. Then I was up another 45 minutes waiting for the heavy part of the storm to pass. Thunder is annoying. High winds, though, make it impossible for me to sleep.
I was just drifting off when Olivia woke up (after the bulk of the thunder had already passed) and said that the storm scared her. So I went to lay with her in her bed. She proceeded to toss and turn, wide awake, for the next three hours. At that point, I was so tired that I was sobbing. I put her on the couch and turned on the TV at 3:45 a.m., resigned to the fact that if she could be entertained by the TV, at least that meant I could get a couple of hours of sleep before I had to get up and face the day. Normally, TV in the middle of the night would NOT be an option, but IT WAS 3:45 A.M. AND I HAD NOT YET HAD ANY SLEEP. I was desperate.
Of course my desperation and sobbing woke my husband, who had been asleep about three hours at that point. He took matters into his own hands, trying to get Olivia to calm down and fall asleep. He finally succeeded about two hours later, only to have her wake up about an hour after THAT with a bad dream.
Needless to say, we are both very, very tired today. And Olivia gets to take a nap this afternoon, whether she wants to or not.
Recovery-wise, things are going smoothly. Olivia still complains of sore throat when she eats something scratchy, but otherwise she is acting and playing normally. Where she was breathing so loudly before surgery that we could hear her on the opposite end of the house, doors closed and TV on, she now breathes so quietly that we have to watch for the rising and falling of her chest to know she is breathing at all.
All this has translated to better overall sleep as long as nothing wakes her prematurely. That part could be a problem. Even after just six hours (of her usual eleven) of sleep last night, she was refreshed enough to stare wide-eyed at the ceiling for the better part of the night.
The other thing I've noticed is that she hasn't had a bedwetting problem since the surgery. She developed that problem around this time last year, when we started noticing her apnea symptoms. It is really too soon to tell since she was so dehydrated for several days following surgery, but she has been "normal" in fluid intake for the last few days, and still she stays dry all night. I'm thinking maybe she was too tired to get up and potty before. So I'm hoping that trend continues.
The huge downside is that she seems to have developed an allergic reaction to all food dyes. Everything is making her break out. Today is the first day in a week that we haven't dosed her with bena*dryl. We aren't sure that dyes are the cause, but it seems to be the common denominator. We are hoping that avoidance of all dyes takes care of THAT problem.
I am so, so tired.
Wednesday, January 18, 2012
Itchy
The surgery recovery continues to be nothing but misery. On Sunday, Olivia broke out in hives. We thought it was the narcotic, so we stopped that and switched to regular ty*lenol. The hives continued and got worse after her Monday dose of antibiotics. So we assumed the antibiotic to be the culprit and started back on the narcotic. They STILL continued but seemed to get worse after the ibuprofen. So yesterday, she had nothing but ty*lenol.
And the hives got worse again.
Last night, at the end of our proverbial rope, we decided to give her nothing at all (except Ben*adryl, because of the hives). She slept basically like all the other nights...peacefully for 5 or 6 hours, then up for 90 minutes in pain until she passed out again for the rest of the night.
But today, she woke up with hives AGAIN. And her throat is very swollen and she doesn't want to talk or eat or drink.
So. The nurse said to stop tylenol and try ibuprofen but only if she absolutely needs something for pain. This, of course, is right in the midst of what they said would be the hardest part of recovery, pain-wise. But right now, the itching hives and the swelling in her throat are causing her more problems than pain. The nurse also advised us to start back on the steroid, which we stopped on Sunday since we weren't sure what was causing the hives, because it is not likely the allergen and will help with the swelling.
Recovery day 7. She's crying because she can't swallow much and she's gagging on mucus and I'm thinking that a ten-day recovery is just a pipe dream. I'm also thinking of buying her a pony* when this is all over. The poor kid deserves a treat** after all this pain and suffering.
*And by "pony", I mean, "special toy or treat of her choice, under $30". Because I'm not made of money. And she's a little terrified of large animals.
**Mommy also deserves a treat. Recovery is pretty hard on caregivers too. Which is why I am 100% sure I am not cut out to be a nurse. Those people should get a special medal or something.
And the hives got worse again.
Last night, at the end of our proverbial rope, we decided to give her nothing at all (except Ben*adryl, because of the hives). She slept basically like all the other nights...peacefully for 5 or 6 hours, then up for 90 minutes in pain until she passed out again for the rest of the night.
But today, she woke up with hives AGAIN. And her throat is very swollen and she doesn't want to talk or eat or drink.
So. The nurse said to stop tylenol and try ibuprofen but only if she absolutely needs something for pain. This, of course, is right in the midst of what they said would be the hardest part of recovery, pain-wise. But right now, the itching hives and the swelling in her throat are causing her more problems than pain. The nurse also advised us to start back on the steroid, which we stopped on Sunday since we weren't sure what was causing the hives, because it is not likely the allergen and will help with the swelling.
Recovery day 7. She's crying because she can't swallow much and she's gagging on mucus and I'm thinking that a ten-day recovery is just a pipe dream. I'm also thinking of buying her a pony* when this is all over. The poor kid deserves a treat** after all this pain and suffering.
*And by "pony", I mean, "special toy or treat of her choice, under $30". Because I'm not made of money. And she's a little terrified of large animals.
**Mommy also deserves a treat. Recovery is pretty hard on caregivers too. Which is why I am 100% sure I am not cut out to be a nurse. Those people should get a special medal or something.
Friday, January 13, 2012
This sucks
Recovery is hard, y'all. Olivia woke up yesterday all swollen in the mouth and crying and wouldn't swallow anything. Today was much the same as yesterday. I don't really know how to fix that.
It seemed to get better as the day went on. By bedtime yesterday she was dancing in the shower and chattering away. But mornings are hard. Everything is hard until she can work herself up to swallowing some medicine. And that takes most of the morning.
My first duty is to get something of the pain-reliever variety in her as soon as she wakes up. It's hard, but necessary. We spend 15 minutes trying to accomplish this. Then she whimpers until it kicks in. We spend another two hours trying to work ourselves up to eating/drinking SOMETHING so she can take her antibiotic and steroids and the REAL pain medicine (all of which should not be taken on an empty stomach, are you kidding me?!). So, here it is after ten o'clock, and I'm still in my pajamas and the only real thing I've accomplished today is force-feeding my kid some ice cream (!) and getting her to take two of the three important meds. We'll work on number three (the narcotic) later, when the steroids kick in and give her a little more energy to eat something and be more cooperative.
I'm exhausted, but I can tell she is even more exhausted. She's also a little confused about her voice. Yesterday, until the swelling went down, she sounded very much like Kermit the Frog with his tongue frozen to a flagpole. Today is a little better, but maybe because she refused to speak any real words for two hours and communicated in grunts and moans. By the end of the day, she sounds more normal, but still a bit pinched. Even she noticed it. "Mommy, my voice sounds weird. It doesn't sound like my normal voice anymore." Sorry kid, that's probably permanent. Adenoids were blocking your air passage. Things are going to be different now...mostly good, but might take some adjustment.
One day at a time. We are on day two of meds and recovery. We were told to expect ten days of soft foods and mild activity. So patience is the name of the game. I suppose it's a good thing that winter decided to kick in just now because it would REALLY suck to be stuck inside and miserable in pretty weather. The snow seems fitting.
It seemed to get better as the day went on. By bedtime yesterday she was dancing in the shower and chattering away. But mornings are hard. Everything is hard until she can work herself up to swallowing some medicine. And that takes most of the morning.
My first duty is to get something of the pain-reliever variety in her as soon as she wakes up. It's hard, but necessary. We spend 15 minutes trying to accomplish this. Then she whimpers until it kicks in. We spend another two hours trying to work ourselves up to eating/drinking SOMETHING so she can take her antibiotic and steroids and the REAL pain medicine (all of which should not be taken on an empty stomach, are you kidding me?!). So, here it is after ten o'clock, and I'm still in my pajamas and the only real thing I've accomplished today is force-feeding my kid some ice cream (!) and getting her to take two of the three important meds. We'll work on number three (the narcotic) later, when the steroids kick in and give her a little more energy to eat something and be more cooperative.
I'm exhausted, but I can tell she is even more exhausted. She's also a little confused about her voice. Yesterday, until the swelling went down, she sounded very much like Kermit the Frog with his tongue frozen to a flagpole. Today is a little better, but maybe because she refused to speak any real words for two hours and communicated in grunts and moans. By the end of the day, she sounds more normal, but still a bit pinched. Even she noticed it. "Mommy, my voice sounds weird. It doesn't sound like my normal voice anymore." Sorry kid, that's probably permanent. Adenoids were blocking your air passage. Things are going to be different now...mostly good, but might take some adjustment.
One day at a time. We are on day two of meds and recovery. We were told to expect ten days of soft foods and mild activity. So patience is the name of the game. I suppose it's a good thing that winter decided to kick in just now because it would REALLY suck to be stuck inside and miserable in pretty weather. The snow seems fitting.
Wednesday, September 28, 2011
I think I need more shelving
I feel like I'm living under stacks of stuff. Olivia and the kids scatter stuff all over the house all day, so I don't even bother to try to keep her room and the living room from looking like a disaster area. But other areas are starting to bug me.
We suffer from a severe lack of storage here, and as a result, things get piled. Since there's not a "place" for everything, stuff just gets piled wherever there is space, and then there is NO organization. And then there's the daily mail, magazines, ads...stuff that is stupid clutter and just gets piled instead of filed or tossed.
Recently, this whole "new baby" thing became very real in my mind and I started to think about all the organization we NEED to do to make our third bedroom a livable space. And I'm more than a little overwhelmed. I feel the urge to buy large quantities of shelving and little plastic storage boxes.
We ARE thinking of having our screen porch enclosed to create a real room, and this will help, but mostly with getting bulky furniture out of the way. I may also have plans to make the children spend lots of time out there coloring, or whatever. I can shut the door and watch them through the glass. Ahhh...silence. 'Tis golden, my friends. If I can accomplish this, it will be well worth whatever we have to spend to put those walls in. Oh yes, it will.
In the meantime, I'm envisioning shelving everywhere. Mostly up high, away from the kids. I already have second, high shelves planned for the garage and the laundry room. They will be too high to access without a step ladder, but that's OK with me. I just need places to put stuff, ya know? I don't need to actually ACCESS the stuff all that often.
Must go deal with the very tired, non-napping child-of-mine.
We suffer from a severe lack of storage here, and as a result, things get piled. Since there's not a "place" for everything, stuff just gets piled wherever there is space, and then there is NO organization. And then there's the daily mail, magazines, ads...stuff that is stupid clutter and just gets piled instead of filed or tossed.
Recently, this whole "new baby" thing became very real in my mind and I started to think about all the organization we NEED to do to make our third bedroom a livable space. And I'm more than a little overwhelmed. I feel the urge to buy large quantities of shelving and little plastic storage boxes.
We ARE thinking of having our screen porch enclosed to create a real room, and this will help, but mostly with getting bulky furniture out of the way. I may also have plans to make the children spend lots of time out there coloring, or whatever. I can shut the door and watch them through the glass. Ahhh...silence. 'Tis golden, my friends. If I can accomplish this, it will be well worth whatever we have to spend to put those walls in. Oh yes, it will.
In the meantime, I'm envisioning shelving everywhere. Mostly up high, away from the kids. I already have second, high shelves planned for the garage and the laundry room. They will be too high to access without a step ladder, but that's OK with me. I just need places to put stuff, ya know? I don't need to actually ACCESS the stuff all that often.
Must go deal with the very tired, non-napping child-of-mine.
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
Why travel sucks even though it is awesome
I have what I think is a respiratory infection, which came on the heels of a nasty cold, which started in the midst of our long weekend of travel in mid-July during which we slept in hotels and spent hours in the car. This awful monster illness is eerily similar to what I got immediately following Spring Break week, when we took a short vacation trip. I think I am sensing a pattern...
When I have a cold, I feel like I am just waiting out life until things get back to normal. My energy is sapped. I have very little to offer Olivia, who is bored stiff and watching her upteenth episode of Disn#y Jr crap just to pass the time. I am so sorry, kid. I would love to take you to the pool or the park or, heck, the backyard. But the steamy, hot weather sends me into fits of coughing, and I'm just trying to keep breathing as it is. (Ok, let's face it...I would avoid the steamy hot weather even if I was well. But I might be more inclined to drive to the library or something.)
The thing is, I really look forward to trips. It is fun to plan and think about doing something out of the ordinary. It's good to have a diversion from the routine. But the price I pay...it just sucks.
Here's what I don't get...I am the only one getting sick. How is that possible? What makes me more susceptible to whatever germs we are encountering when the three of us travel together? And how can I fix that?
Ugh. There are no answers. I hate that I'm spending precious Summer time wasting away the days being sick. Babysitting resumes on August 10th. That's just two weeks away! Must get out of the house while we can!
So. We are going "to town" to buy canning jars and spices to make some dill pickles this afternoon. High excitement going on here.
When I have a cold, I feel like I am just waiting out life until things get back to normal. My energy is sapped. I have very little to offer Olivia, who is bored stiff and watching her upteenth episode of Disn#y Jr crap just to pass the time. I am so sorry, kid. I would love to take you to the pool or the park or, heck, the backyard. But the steamy, hot weather sends me into fits of coughing, and I'm just trying to keep breathing as it is. (Ok, let's face it...I would avoid the steamy hot weather even if I was well. But I might be more inclined to drive to the library or something.)
The thing is, I really look forward to trips. It is fun to plan and think about doing something out of the ordinary. It's good to have a diversion from the routine. But the price I pay...it just sucks.
Here's what I don't get...I am the only one getting sick. How is that possible? What makes me more susceptible to whatever germs we are encountering when the three of us travel together? And how can I fix that?
Ugh. There are no answers. I hate that I'm spending precious Summer time wasting away the days being sick. Babysitting resumes on August 10th. That's just two weeks away! Must get out of the house while we can!
So. We are going "to town" to buy canning jars and spices to make some dill pickles this afternoon. High excitement going on here.
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
The potty horror
I'm procrastinating here, big time. There's something I should be focused on writing for a workshop we are leading in a couple of weeks, and I just don't feel like summoning the brain power to block out the kids and write it.
So let me tell you about my most recent parenting observation: Auto-flush toilets are evil devices of child torture.
Last night, we went to a parish Lenten program, and since we were in town we made a late run after the program to Department Superstore (you know which one) to grab some essentials. Olivia was tired but behaving pretty well, and we expected an easy bedtime wherein she would fall asleep in the car and be carried away to bed, the end. This plan required that we put her PJs on at the store and make sure she used the potty before getting in the car. Then, as we were heading to the car for PJs, she announced that she needed to potty. Perfect! We don't even have to fight the "I don't HAVE to potty" battle tonight.
Then we entered the stall and realized our mistake. Department Superstore has auto-flush toilets. Olivia took one look at that evil "eye" and hopped off the potty, declaring that she absolutely did NOT need to potty and would like to go to the car now, please. I tried to convince her to just sit up straight and it wouldn't flush until she was finished. She thought I was going to force her to sit on the Evil Potty of Doom and commenced shrieking as if I were pulling out her fingernails with a pair of pliers. I heard some murmurs from outside the stall and am fairly certain that the employees of Superstore were *thisclose* to calling CPS to report the crazy lady who was performing unspeakable torture on her child in the bathroom stall. Olivia was having THAT kind of crazy freak-out.
I finally convinced her that we just needed to change clothes so we could go to the car. We walked out quickly (I'm pretty sure some employees were staring daggers through me). Then we had to make a quick stop at a fast food place so she could go to the potty (which she still needed to do). After all that drama, she dropped off to sleep within five minutes. Lesson learned...do not attempt to use the potty at Department Superstore. The end.
So let me tell you about my most recent parenting observation: Auto-flush toilets are evil devices of child torture.
Last night, we went to a parish Lenten program, and since we were in town we made a late run after the program to Department Superstore (you know which one) to grab some essentials. Olivia was tired but behaving pretty well, and we expected an easy bedtime wherein she would fall asleep in the car and be carried away to bed, the end. This plan required that we put her PJs on at the store and make sure she used the potty before getting in the car. Then, as we were heading to the car for PJs, she announced that she needed to potty. Perfect! We don't even have to fight the "I don't HAVE to potty" battle tonight.
Then we entered the stall and realized our mistake. Department Superstore has auto-flush toilets. Olivia took one look at that evil "eye" and hopped off the potty, declaring that she absolutely did NOT need to potty and would like to go to the car now, please. I tried to convince her to just sit up straight and it wouldn't flush until she was finished. She thought I was going to force her to sit on the Evil Potty of Doom and commenced shrieking as if I were pulling out her fingernails with a pair of pliers. I heard some murmurs from outside the stall and am fairly certain that the employees of Superstore were *thisclose* to calling CPS to report the crazy lady who was performing unspeakable torture on her child in the bathroom stall. Olivia was having THAT kind of crazy freak-out.
I finally convinced her that we just needed to change clothes so we could go to the car. We walked out quickly (I'm pretty sure some employees were staring daggers through me). Then we had to make a quick stop at a fast food place so she could go to the potty (which she still needed to do). After all that drama, she dropped off to sleep within five minutes. Lesson learned...do not attempt to use the potty at Department Superstore. The end.
Tuesday, March 1, 2011
Post-illness re-training
The stomach-virus-from-hell finally departed our poor child on Sunday, which was the first day that she felt like playing and being off the couch. Six straight days of nausea and whining demands from her couch position...it was exhausting for all of us. And now she's back to her normal self. The end.
The babysitting kids are all back this week, which has been good and bad. The boys are typically a delight. They have their moments, but for the most part they are instruct-able when they get out of line.
Olivia, of course, has her issues. She's a high maintenance kid and always has been, so I've always had to take a pretty hard line on discipline and make sure to remain consistent all the time. She knows what kind of behavior is tolerated and what is not, and when she misbehaves or gives me attitude, she can't go back to playing until she corrects the behavior...or the attitude. Pouting is not allowed.
We are doing a little re-training this week because of all the allowances made during sick week, where we catered to her every pitiful need. She's adjusting to re-training fairly well, if a little slowly.
And then there's the other little girl in my charge. She is only here two or three days a week, and when there's a weekend (or a sick week), sometimes she also requires a bit of re-training. Her issue is pouting or crying when she doesn't get her way. As with all pouting and crying, I demand that she has to remove herself from the group until she can give me a good attitude. For her, it is REALLY hard and usually requires at least a half hour of screaming at the top of her lungs before she settles down.
As you can imagine, such screaming is disruptive to the rest of the household and more than my nerves can take. So once she commences screaming, she is moved to the nap room where she must stay by herself until she calms down.
You'd think that, after a few such scream sessions, she'd figure out that all she has to do to return to playing is to stop screaming and apologize/play nicely/stop pouting. But it doesn't seem to be sinking in. It makes me wonder what she gets away with at home.
So. That is what we are dealing with today. Thank goodness the sun is out and we managed to get out in it for an hour. I needed the Vitamin D and mood boost.
The babysitting kids are all back this week, which has been good and bad. The boys are typically a delight. They have their moments, but for the most part they are instruct-able when they get out of line.
Olivia, of course, has her issues. She's a high maintenance kid and always has been, so I've always had to take a pretty hard line on discipline and make sure to remain consistent all the time. She knows what kind of behavior is tolerated and what is not, and when she misbehaves or gives me attitude, she can't go back to playing until she corrects the behavior...or the attitude. Pouting is not allowed.
We are doing a little re-training this week because of all the allowances made during sick week, where we catered to her every pitiful need. She's adjusting to re-training fairly well, if a little slowly.
And then there's the other little girl in my charge. She is only here two or three days a week, and when there's a weekend (or a sick week), sometimes she also requires a bit of re-training. Her issue is pouting or crying when she doesn't get her way. As with all pouting and crying, I demand that she has to remove herself from the group until she can give me a good attitude. For her, it is REALLY hard and usually requires at least a half hour of screaming at the top of her lungs before she settles down.
As you can imagine, such screaming is disruptive to the rest of the household and more than my nerves can take. So once she commences screaming, she is moved to the nap room where she must stay by herself until she calms down.
You'd think that, after a few such scream sessions, she'd figure out that all she has to do to return to playing is to stop screaming and apologize/play nicely/stop pouting. But it doesn't seem to be sinking in. It makes me wonder what she gets away with at home.
So. That is what we are dealing with today. Thank goodness the sun is out and we managed to get out in it for an hour. I needed the Vitamin D and mood boost.
Thursday, December 16, 2010
In which I establish my first resolution
Today is our second "snow" day of the week. I'm already sick of winter. No kids on Monday because of snow. Today it is ice. And my husband has been gone on business since Sunday. We are rattling around in this house, the kid and I. Thank God Joe finally gets home today.
We went out to "shovel" the ice off of the driveway, and both Olivia and I ended up on our backsides. Our driveway is not level...it is a gradual downward slope. The thin sheet of ice was just enough to require us to crawl back up the driveway on our knees. We could get no traction with our shoes.
So, we trekked out to the backyard (the grass was not slippery at all) with a bucket and chipped the ice off of the sandbox lid. We returned to the driveway with a full bucket of sand and two sand shovels. Olivia shoveled sand onto the driveway while I chipped away at the ice with an edging shovel (which worked infinitely better than the snow shovel). I think we may now have enough traction to make it out to go to the post office, but I haven't been back out to test it yet. We shall see...
Since last week, I have decided that the nap is, perhaps, to blame for many of our troubles. Too much energy = too much mischief. I have tested this theory only once, with today being the second try. On Tuesday, we went all day without a nap. By the end of the day, she was exhausted from her first day EVER without a nap. I was exhausted from entertaining the grumpy, whiny three-year-old all afternoon. But then came bedtime, which involved minimal fighting and a sleeping child in under ten minutes! Before 7:30 p.m.! And the angels did sing...
(Have I mentioned our recent sleep troubles? The fights at bedtime? The constant power struggle? Sitting with a not-so-tired child until she finally gives in to sleep at around 10:00 p.m.? No? Well, it has NOT been fun.)
Anyway, all this is to say that we've been avoiding nap today. And we are ice-bound. And alone. So we've been trying to find something crafty to do. We ended up with the scary angel,
and these wreaths. There was a lot of Mommy prep work to do on both, but Olivia enjoyed pressing bows and balls into the hot glue. And it killed an hour or so.
Oh, did I not mention the shiner? A product of Monday's snow day, I'm afraid. And it didn't even happen outside, on a slick surface. She was bouncing on her bed (a forbidden activity, as if it matters) and kneed herself in the eye. Yeah.
So, while I was searching my crafty boxes for something to do, I came across these almost-finished projects that have been collecting for years. YEARS. And I came up with a resolution. In 2011, I will finish or frame all of these. They include, in no particular order:
Irish blessing cross stitch. The pattern was a gift from my husband when he led a tour to Ireland a few weeks before we got married. We're not even Irish, so I'm not sure what to do with it. Frame it? Give it as a gift? Hang it somewhere?
I made this turtle cross stitch in high school. I am not even kidding. It has been languishing in my craft box for that long. Pillow? Frame?
Another gift from Joe, this time after a conference at this institution. I REALLY don't know what to do with this one. I'm not a fan. I love the campus, but kind of can't stand the school. And I'm not really a college sports fan. So...?
This is a sampler I did a couple of years back just because I was looking for something to do. It's too small to frame, really, except as a child's room accessory. It does have nice colors for a kid's room. Maybe I will frame it.
This one has been due for framing for about 13 years. I bought it while I was at Harlaxton College for a semester in college. It is in Lincolnshire county. So this is sort of a souvenir that I stitched myself. Never mind that I barely made it to any of these places outside of Grantham. We spent most of our weekends in London and points North. But still. The finished product is wrinkled and sized funny so will require professional framing, I'm afraid. But I spent so much time on it...I feel like it needs to hang somewhere in my house.
This is a pillow I made as a gift that I never ended up giving away because I didn't like the way the ruffle turned out. But Olivia and I stuffed it anyway (today) and I will stitch it together and let her throw it around in her room. At least it will get used.
I also have a box full of matching quilt blocks that do not amount to an actual quilt. Gotta do something about that this year too.
And I also resolve not to have any more snow days. Can I do that?
We went out to "shovel" the ice off of the driveway, and both Olivia and I ended up on our backsides. Our driveway is not level...it is a gradual downward slope. The thin sheet of ice was just enough to require us to crawl back up the driveway on our knees. We could get no traction with our shoes.
So, we trekked out to the backyard (the grass was not slippery at all) with a bucket and chipped the ice off of the sandbox lid. We returned to the driveway with a full bucket of sand and two sand shovels. Olivia shoveled sand onto the driveway while I chipped away at the ice with an edging shovel (which worked infinitely better than the snow shovel). I think we may now have enough traction to make it out to go to the post office, but I haven't been back out to test it yet. We shall see...
Since last week, I have decided that the nap is, perhaps, to blame for many of our troubles. Too much energy = too much mischief. I have tested this theory only once, with today being the second try. On Tuesday, we went all day without a nap. By the end of the day, she was exhausted from her first day EVER without a nap. I was exhausted from entertaining the grumpy, whiny three-year-old all afternoon. But then came bedtime, which involved minimal fighting and a sleeping child in under ten minutes! Before 7:30 p.m.! And the angels did sing...
(Have I mentioned our recent sleep troubles? The fights at bedtime? The constant power struggle? Sitting with a not-so-tired child until she finally gives in to sleep at around 10:00 p.m.? No? Well, it has NOT been fun.)
Anyway, all this is to say that we've been avoiding nap today. And we are ice-bound. And alone. So we've been trying to find something crafty to do. We ended up with the scary angel,
Oh, did I not mention the shiner? A product of Monday's snow day, I'm afraid. And it didn't even happen outside, on a slick surface. She was bouncing on her bed (a forbidden activity, as if it matters) and kneed herself in the eye. Yeah.So, while I was searching my crafty boxes for something to do, I came across these almost-finished projects that have been collecting for years. YEARS. And I came up with a resolution. In 2011, I will finish or frame all of these. They include, in no particular order:
Irish blessing cross stitch. The pattern was a gift from my husband when he led a tour to Ireland a few weeks before we got married. We're not even Irish, so I'm not sure what to do with it. Frame it? Give it as a gift? Hang it somewhere?
I made this turtle cross stitch in high school. I am not even kidding. It has been languishing in my craft box for that long. Pillow? Frame?
Another gift from Joe, this time after a conference at this institution. I REALLY don't know what to do with this one. I'm not a fan. I love the campus, but kind of can't stand the school. And I'm not really a college sports fan. So...?
This is a sampler I did a couple of years back just because I was looking for something to do. It's too small to frame, really, except as a child's room accessory. It does have nice colors for a kid's room. Maybe I will frame it.
This one has been due for framing for about 13 years. I bought it while I was at Harlaxton College for a semester in college. It is in Lincolnshire county. So this is sort of a souvenir that I stitched myself. Never mind that I barely made it to any of these places outside of Grantham. We spent most of our weekends in London and points North. But still. The finished product is wrinkled and sized funny so will require professional framing, I'm afraid. But I spent so much time on it...I feel like it needs to hang somewhere in my house.
This is a pillow I made as a gift that I never ended up giving away because I didn't like the way the ruffle turned out. But Olivia and I stuffed it anyway (today) and I will stitch it together and let her throw it around in her room. At least it will get used.
I also have a box full of matching quilt blocks that do not amount to an actual quilt. Gotta do something about that this year too.And I also resolve not to have any more snow days. Can I do that?
Wednesday, December 8, 2010
I think we are the problem and the solution
I'm coming to terms with the fact that my child may suffer from ADHD. Yes, this is something I've diagnosed myself, and I could be totally wrong. Most doctors warn against trying to diagnose a child until age six or so because so many of the hallmark behaviors (restlessness, inattention, easily distracted, impulsive) apply to most preschoolers. But in a group, Olivia is always, without exception, the most active, least attentive, most distracting child. True, her groups have thus far been limited to Bible school, gymnastics and family gatherings. But still.
I don't know...maybe I'm jumping the gun on this. But recently? Life has just been hard. Part of it, I think, is the fact that it is winter and therefore too cold to work out those energies in some active sort of way. So it comes out in more destructive, aggressive ways. As a result, we are all yelling. A lot.
One place we don't yell is in Church, and that seems to be where Olivia's worst behavior manifests itself. I hate that we leave Mass every week frustrated and not at all spiritually nourished because we just spent the last 50 minutes wrestling with/negotiating with/ threatening our child who won't stop talking and using the back of the pew in front of us as a stand-in for the uneven bars. (She says she is practicing holding her arms stiff and pointing her toes, which she did learn to do in gymnastics, and nothing I say can convince her that this is not the right place or time to be practicing her gymnastic skills.) When she disobeys in Church, she KNOWS that we can't do anything about it right there, and she flashes that devious grin when she gets away with the misbehavior. She's impulsive and defiant, and some of her worst behavior shows up in Church.
At home, she bounces around. I don't know how else to describe it. She doesn't stay in one place much. She jumps on the couch and the bed even though she KNOWS that is not allowed. When I ask her to do something, she comes up with indecipherable excuses, and when I insist that she do it anyway, she wanders off and does everything she possibly can to avoid doing this one thing. If (when) things get so frustrating that the yelling begins, it just causes her misbehavior to escalate. IT. IS. MADDENING.
So. Most of what I've read recommends behavioral adjustments for small children and their parents. Rigid schedules. Constant parental attention. Positive reinforcement. Calm tones. I know this stuff works to an extent, because I've seen her behavior change when we are off schedule or when Olivia is fighting to get our attention or the difference in yelling versus calm and persistent requests. I get it. It's us. We need to step up and be the parents that Olivia needs us to be. And coming to that realization is hard because it means that we are going to have to change a lot of things around here and break a lot of bad parental habits. I'm sure it will be worth it. I just hope it will be enough to break the cycle of bad behavior.
But I still have my doubts about her ability to sit still in Church. Help!
I don't know...maybe I'm jumping the gun on this. But recently? Life has just been hard. Part of it, I think, is the fact that it is winter and therefore too cold to work out those energies in some active sort of way. So it comes out in more destructive, aggressive ways. As a result, we are all yelling. A lot.
One place we don't yell is in Church, and that seems to be where Olivia's worst behavior manifests itself. I hate that we leave Mass every week frustrated and not at all spiritually nourished because we just spent the last 50 minutes wrestling with/negotiating with/ threatening our child who won't stop talking and using the back of the pew in front of us as a stand-in for the uneven bars. (She says she is practicing holding her arms stiff and pointing her toes, which she did learn to do in gymnastics, and nothing I say can convince her that this is not the right place or time to be practicing her gymnastic skills.) When she disobeys in Church, she KNOWS that we can't do anything about it right there, and she flashes that devious grin when she gets away with the misbehavior. She's impulsive and defiant, and some of her worst behavior shows up in Church.
At home, she bounces around. I don't know how else to describe it. She doesn't stay in one place much. She jumps on the couch and the bed even though she KNOWS that is not allowed. When I ask her to do something, she comes up with indecipherable excuses, and when I insist that she do it anyway, she wanders off and does everything she possibly can to avoid doing this one thing. If (when) things get so frustrating that the yelling begins, it just causes her misbehavior to escalate. IT. IS. MADDENING.
So. Most of what I've read recommends behavioral adjustments for small children and their parents. Rigid schedules. Constant parental attention. Positive reinforcement. Calm tones. I know this stuff works to an extent, because I've seen her behavior change when we are off schedule or when Olivia is fighting to get our attention or the difference in yelling versus calm and persistent requests. I get it. It's us. We need to step up and be the parents that Olivia needs us to be. And coming to that realization is hard because it means that we are going to have to change a lot of things around here and break a lot of bad parental habits. I'm sure it will be worth it. I just hope it will be enough to break the cycle of bad behavior.
But I still have my doubts about her ability to sit still in Church. Help!
Monday, November 15, 2010
I feel stupid.
We made the decision to go ahead and purchase laminate flooring for our living spaces. This is a decision that is about a year in the works, and this weekend we decided to take advantage of a sale and go ahead and get the flooring. AND Joe told me to go by myself as soon as naptime began and he would stay home and keep an eye on Olivia (and the other eye on football). It was a win-win for both of us...he got some quiet time at home alone, and I got some quiet time out of the house alone...exactly the opposite of what usually happens.
In addition to getting the flooring, I ran a few errands hither and yon. By myself. On no schedule. It was heavenly. And while I got enough of a glimpse of pre-holiday traffic and crowds and consumerism to strengthen my resolve to shop exclusively online this holiday season, it was surprisingly relaxing.
I think all at-home parents need this once in awhile. We get so used to planning our activities around the schedules and demands and patience level of our children that we sometimes forget how to handle our brains when we can focus our attention on other things.
That said, my brain utterly failed me on the exact same day. We were invited to a celebration dinner that took place yesterday (and agreed to bring a dessert). I had been looking forward to going. And I completely forgot. Completely. It didn't even occur to me until I got a Facebook comment this morning from a friend who WAS there and wondered where we were. I feel like a complete idiot. I have no excuse except that Saturday was so BUSY and then it was over and we just woke up on Sunday morning and got back to routine. So, so stupid.
Now my lovely Sunday outing is tainted by the knowledge that I screwed up other rather important plans. Stupid, stupid brain.
In addition to getting the flooring, I ran a few errands hither and yon. By myself. On no schedule. It was heavenly. And while I got enough of a glimpse of pre-holiday traffic and crowds and consumerism to strengthen my resolve to shop exclusively online this holiday season, it was surprisingly relaxing.
I think all at-home parents need this once in awhile. We get so used to planning our activities around the schedules and demands and patience level of our children that we sometimes forget how to handle our brains when we can focus our attention on other things.
That said, my brain utterly failed me on the exact same day. We were invited to a celebration dinner that took place yesterday (and agreed to bring a dessert). I had been looking forward to going. And I completely forgot. Completely. It didn't even occur to me until I got a Facebook comment this morning from a friend who WAS there and wondered where we were. I feel like a complete idiot. I have no excuse except that Saturday was so BUSY and then it was over and we just woke up on Sunday morning and got back to routine. So, so stupid.
Now my lovely Sunday outing is tainted by the knowledge that I screwed up other rather important plans. Stupid, stupid brain.
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
Procrastination in weird form
So, this week I have been very busy with many things to procrastinate on the one thing I've been needing to finish for weeks. I have this report for our Fertility Care Center that I'm supposed to complete for the Diocese, and it means compiling all kinds of client numbers and financial data into some sort of readable format. I have all the information. It's just getting that information into report form that is tripping me up. And sending me searching for other projects.
I've not had problems FINDING other projects, mind you. There is a lot that has needed to be done around here for awhile. The hand-me-down influx last week motivated me to organize my clothing storage boxes. I found a home for one whole size of clothes that Olivia has grown out of but her cousins won't grow into for another year. So they are boxed and ready to be passed on to MY cousin's daughter, who will then pass them on to my niece in a year. I went through Olivia's toys and removed those that she has outgrown. Those were sorted into piles for storage or donation. Some were selected to be given to our adopt-a-family at Christmas. Those were wrapped and stacked. I went through the PILE OF CRAP, a.k.a. mostly junk mail and sorted out real mail and recycled the rest. I went online to check the status of the insurance claims from my recent hospital stays (a bit of an obsession...I just want that chapter of our financial life closed already). I called the bowling alley where we'll have Olivia's birthday party on Saturday and nailed down some details.
I guess it's time to finish that report. *Sigh* Let's hope that naptime lasts long enough for me to complete it. I'm not sure I can muster the motivation to even pull it out two days in a row.
I've not had problems FINDING other projects, mind you. There is a lot that has needed to be done around here for awhile. The hand-me-down influx last week motivated me to organize my clothing storage boxes. I found a home for one whole size of clothes that Olivia has grown out of but her cousins won't grow into for another year. So they are boxed and ready to be passed on to MY cousin's daughter, who will then pass them on to my niece in a year. I went through Olivia's toys and removed those that she has outgrown. Those were sorted into piles for storage or donation. Some were selected to be given to our adopt-a-family at Christmas. Those were wrapped and stacked. I went through the PILE OF CRAP, a.k.a. mostly junk mail and sorted out real mail and recycled the rest. I went online to check the status of the insurance claims from my recent hospital stays (a bit of an obsession...I just want that chapter of our financial life closed already). I called the bowling alley where we'll have Olivia's birthday party on Saturday and nailed down some details.
I guess it's time to finish that report. *Sigh* Let's hope that naptime lasts long enough for me to complete it. I'm not sure I can muster the motivation to even pull it out two days in a row.
Tuesday, November 9, 2010
Evaluation time
I took Olivia to gymnastics last night and decided that it's time. It is time to ask her doctor about having her evaluated.
I don't even know if that is the right term...evaluated. I don't know who would do that sort of thing. But I expect that her doctor would know, and she's seeing him at the end of the month for her 3 year check-up. And I just need to know. Does my child have an attention or hyperactivity problem?
So, gymnastics. It has not been terribly productive, but it gives her an outlet to do something active in a group. Except that I think the group is a bit too big. In fact, anything over 4 or 5 kids at this point is too big for Olivia. The kids stand in line for their turn to practice this skill or that, and every other kid gets to go at least 1.5 times for every once that Olivia goes. This is because she's constantly distracted while in line. She'll watch the older girls or another class. She'll hop out of line to check out something that has caught her attention. She always returns to the end of the line and sometimes I wonder if she's ever going to make it to the front.
And also, yesterday, she came upstairs to the parents' observation loft FOUR different times. Once she said she was just checking on me. Another time she came up to tell me she tooted. And I have no idea why she ran off the floor the other two times. I have NO IDEA.
Yes, she's three (almost), and young kids are like that. But there are other kids in her class who are younger than she is and they have dramatically better attention skills than Olivia has.
The funny thing is that she's so strong and so skilled, and she can DO this gymnastics thing. If she had a personal trainer for 45 minutes every week, she'd be a tumbling whiz by this time next year. And it's like that with everything. She needs hands-on, one-on-one attention. But how do you accomplish that in real life? I'm just afraid that she'll end up in a kindergarten class of 15 or 20 kids in a few years and end up being the class troublemaker. I'd like to avoid that.
I don't even know if that is the right term...evaluated. I don't know who would do that sort of thing. But I expect that her doctor would know, and she's seeing him at the end of the month for her 3 year check-up. And I just need to know. Does my child have an attention or hyperactivity problem?
So, gymnastics. It has not been terribly productive, but it gives her an outlet to do something active in a group. Except that I think the group is a bit too big. In fact, anything over 4 or 5 kids at this point is too big for Olivia. The kids stand in line for their turn to practice this skill or that, and every other kid gets to go at least 1.5 times for every once that Olivia goes. This is because she's constantly distracted while in line. She'll watch the older girls or another class. She'll hop out of line to check out something that has caught her attention. She always returns to the end of the line and sometimes I wonder if she's ever going to make it to the front.
And also, yesterday, she came upstairs to the parents' observation loft FOUR different times. Once she said she was just checking on me. Another time she came up to tell me she tooted. And I have no idea why she ran off the floor the other two times. I have NO IDEA.
Yes, she's three (almost), and young kids are like that. But there are other kids in her class who are younger than she is and they have dramatically better attention skills than Olivia has.
The funny thing is that she's so strong and so skilled, and she can DO this gymnastics thing. If she had a personal trainer for 45 minutes every week, she'd be a tumbling whiz by this time next year. And it's like that with everything. She needs hands-on, one-on-one attention. But how do you accomplish that in real life? I'm just afraid that she'll end up in a kindergarten class of 15 or 20 kids in a few years and end up being the class troublemaker. I'd like to avoid that.
Monday, November 8, 2010
Oh, so many things...
I've been sick for over a week. Upper respiratory infection. I'm on my final day of antibiotics, and I feel much better, overall, than I did this time last Thursday. But there's still the wheezing, which leads to the coughing. I have a permanent pain on both sides of my abs from all of the coughing. IT. IS. EXHAUSTING.
Last week, Samantha called and asked me to come pick up some things she wanted to give Olivia. She had a bunch of stuff that her girls owned...clothes and toys and such. Her parental rights were terminated a couple of months ago, and she's in the process of moving somewhere new and starting over, and she desperately wanted Olivia to have all of this stuff since her girls can't. "Bring your van."
Wow. I wish she would have warned me to remove all of the seats in the van first. There was A LOT. OF STUFF. I told her we'd use what we could and consign the rest and put the cash in Olivia's college fund. She was fine with that plan. So I spent three days washing loads of little girl clothes, size 4T to 8. I sorted and piled and made boxes for summer clothes for next year and winter size 6 and 7 to lend to my older nieces. We're talking NICE stuff. Piles and piles of jeans. Pretty blouses and sweaters and jackets. I stuffed Olivia's closet as full as I could (she already had a pretty large hand-me-down wardrobe in 4T before this influx). I sorted out stuff I knew we couldn't use and put it in four kitchen trash bags for donation. I have a pack-n-play full of stuff to consign for the Spring sales. I packed four sets of toddler bed sheets into a box and wrapped it for our Christmas adopt-a-family. I was overwhelmed by the sheer volume of clothing and bedding.
And the toys. There were several things...each was given individual attention with a toothbrush and a container of Clorox wipes (the toys have been sitting, unused, for about a year). Olivia received them as soon as they were clean. And she seriously thinks it has been her birthday for several days already. I should have saved some of this stuff for Christmas. It's bound to be a letdown after last week's toy infusion and this weekend's birthday party.
So. Olivia's excited. I'm a little befuddled. I can't imagine spending that kind of cash on clothes. Was it all new when they got it? I don't know. But, wow. I feel a little unworthy as the recipient (on Olivia's behalf) of such a wealth of stuff. But I know it made Samantha happy, and I'm hoping that we can spread the wealth a little, sharing clothes around so that everyone we know gets lots of use out of this stuff (and I get some storage space back).
Olivia's birthday is Friday. We're having a bowling party for her on Saturday. I feel like there is some sort of planning I need to be doing, but beyond calling the alley with numbers for lanes and food, I can't think of anything. I think the sick has fried my brain. I haven't been able to do anything cognitively challenging for a few days. Just sorting clothes and sorting clothes and sorting clothes...
Only about 15 coughing fits while completing this post. An improvement...maybe?
Last week, Samantha called and asked me to come pick up some things she wanted to give Olivia. She had a bunch of stuff that her girls owned...clothes and toys and such. Her parental rights were terminated a couple of months ago, and she's in the process of moving somewhere new and starting over, and she desperately wanted Olivia to have all of this stuff since her girls can't. "Bring your van."
Wow. I wish she would have warned me to remove all of the seats in the van first. There was A LOT. OF STUFF. I told her we'd use what we could and consign the rest and put the cash in Olivia's college fund. She was fine with that plan. So I spent three days washing loads of little girl clothes, size 4T to 8. I sorted and piled and made boxes for summer clothes for next year and winter size 6 and 7 to lend to my older nieces. We're talking NICE stuff. Piles and piles of jeans. Pretty blouses and sweaters and jackets. I stuffed Olivia's closet as full as I could (she already had a pretty large hand-me-down wardrobe in 4T before this influx). I sorted out stuff I knew we couldn't use and put it in four kitchen trash bags for donation. I have a pack-n-play full of stuff to consign for the Spring sales. I packed four sets of toddler bed sheets into a box and wrapped it for our Christmas adopt-a-family. I was overwhelmed by the sheer volume of clothing and bedding.
And the toys. There were several things...each was given individual attention with a toothbrush and a container of Clorox wipes (the toys have been sitting, unused, for about a year). Olivia received them as soon as they were clean. And she seriously thinks it has been her birthday for several days already. I should have saved some of this stuff for Christmas. It's bound to be a letdown after last week's toy infusion and this weekend's birthday party.
So. Olivia's excited. I'm a little befuddled. I can't imagine spending that kind of cash on clothes. Was it all new when they got it? I don't know. But, wow. I feel a little unworthy as the recipient (on Olivia's behalf) of such a wealth of stuff. But I know it made Samantha happy, and I'm hoping that we can spread the wealth a little, sharing clothes around so that everyone we know gets lots of use out of this stuff (and I get some storage space back).
Olivia's birthday is Friday. We're having a bowling party for her on Saturday. I feel like there is some sort of planning I need to be doing, but beyond calling the alley with numbers for lanes and food, I can't think of anything. I think the sick has fried my brain. I haven't been able to do anything cognitively challenging for a few days. Just sorting clothes and sorting clothes and sorting clothes...
Only about 15 coughing fits while completing this post. An improvement...maybe?
Friday, October 29, 2010
Please don't give my kid candy. Just don't.
Halloween is just a couple of days away, and Olivia is excited. I mean, she's been talking about trick-or-treating since the Halloween merchandise started showing up in stores around, oh, the end of August. Right after they put away the back-to-school stuff. Because we need two whole months to prepare for a holiday that lasts just one day, right?
Grrr! As if it's not bad enough having to dodge candy displays for nine or ten weeks, now we have to either avoid all the Halloween party fun or figure out a way to hide and ration candy WHILE collecting it. That's hard stuff, y'all.
So. Wednesday night is religion class. And, yes, it is a little pointless to take an almost-3-year-old to religion class. Especially when she knows more rote prayers and can better articulate who Jesus is than 90 percent of the first communion class at our parish. (And no, I'm not even kidding. If they don't hear them at home, second graders are not going to know their prayers. And they are NOT hearing them at home. Or at church. Because their parents don't bring them to church very often. But that's an entirely different post.) We agreed long ago that our child would receive her religious education at home, from two people who individually know more about the Catholic Church than the entire group of catechists at our parish combined. Yeah, I know that makes me sound arrogant and know-it-all-ie. But it's true, and if I can't talk about it here on my blog than where can I talk about it? My husband has a Masters degree in Catholic Life and Thought. I spent my entire professional life planning programming for Catholic families in our diocese, which required more than a little bit of research and study in All Things Catholic, including a heavy emphasis on Theology of the Body. The average qualifying traits of most of the catechists at our parish is that they were raised Catholic, have had their kids baptized, and they show up to Sunday Mass about 80 percent of the time. And it scares me to imagine putting my child's religious education in their hands.
And yet, here we are with our preschooler in religion class. She's there mostly because she is at an age where she LOVES being around other kids, and we hoped being in some sort of organized setting where she has to pay attention to a teacher might actually help her attention span a bit. Although I think she may be getting more out of her weekly gymnastics class (which she also recently started).
Aaaand...I'm rambling.
So, on Wednesday night, there was a Halloween party for the last half of religion class. (Don't even get me started on what a waste THAT is. Not the point.) Everyone was supposed to bring a treat to share with the whole group...grades preschool up to 7th, I think. Twenty five or thirty kids.
Now, I knew about the party coming into this. And I had a feeling that it would be a nightmare. I knew we should have stayed home. Sugar and my child do not mix well. Even though she LIVES for sugar. It screws with her ability to behave like a civilized being. And chocolate is like taking the sugar crazed kid and gluing her eyes open for hours on end. Yeah.
I told Olivia she could pick TWO sweet treats. And out of the whole table full of stuff, she did just that. I was very proud of her. Except that they were both chocolate.
And we didn't get her to fall asleep until almost 11:00 p.m.
I think I hate Halloween.
Grrr! As if it's not bad enough having to dodge candy displays for nine or ten weeks, now we have to either avoid all the Halloween party fun or figure out a way to hide and ration candy WHILE collecting it. That's hard stuff, y'all.
So. Wednesday night is religion class. And, yes, it is a little pointless to take an almost-3-year-old to religion class. Especially when she knows more rote prayers and can better articulate who Jesus is than 90 percent of the first communion class at our parish. (And no, I'm not even kidding. If they don't hear them at home, second graders are not going to know their prayers. And they are NOT hearing them at home. Or at church. Because their parents don't bring them to church very often. But that's an entirely different post.) We agreed long ago that our child would receive her religious education at home, from two people who individually know more about the Catholic Church than the entire group of catechists at our parish combined. Yeah, I know that makes me sound arrogant and know-it-all-ie. But it's true, and if I can't talk about it here on my blog than where can I talk about it? My husband has a Masters degree in Catholic Life and Thought. I spent my entire professional life planning programming for Catholic families in our diocese, which required more than a little bit of research and study in All Things Catholic, including a heavy emphasis on Theology of the Body. The average qualifying traits of most of the catechists at our parish is that they were raised Catholic, have had their kids baptized, and they show up to Sunday Mass about 80 percent of the time. And it scares me to imagine putting my child's religious education in their hands.
And yet, here we are with our preschooler in religion class. She's there mostly because she is at an age where she LOVES being around other kids, and we hoped being in some sort of organized setting where she has to pay attention to a teacher might actually help her attention span a bit. Although I think she may be getting more out of her weekly gymnastics class (which she also recently started).
Aaaand...I'm rambling.
So, on Wednesday night, there was a Halloween party for the last half of religion class. (Don't even get me started on what a waste THAT is. Not the point.) Everyone was supposed to bring a treat to share with the whole group...grades preschool up to 7th, I think. Twenty five or thirty kids.
Now, I knew about the party coming into this. And I had a feeling that it would be a nightmare. I knew we should have stayed home. Sugar and my child do not mix well. Even though she LIVES for sugar. It screws with her ability to behave like a civilized being. And chocolate is like taking the sugar crazed kid and gluing her eyes open for hours on end. Yeah.
I told Olivia she could pick TWO sweet treats. And out of the whole table full of stuff, she did just that. I was very proud of her. Except that they were both chocolate.
And we didn't get her to fall asleep until almost 11:00 p.m.
I think I hate Halloween.
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Success, then failure
I took Olivia, diaperless, to Local Theme Park today with two goals: make it through a morning of fun with no accidents, and wear her out for a good, long nap.
I watched her like a hawk throughout our playing and caught her striking the "poopy pose" twice. Both times I rushed her to the potty and both times she pooped in the potty. YAY! Much success. Score TWO for Olivia! Although I don't really think you can call her potty trained until she actually initiates the bathroom visit herself. But we're getting there.
We were having so much fun. We did the waterpark, watched a show, did funtown (kiddie section), went to another show. I was going to take her home for nap after show #2 (she's such a huge fan of these shows). Halfway through the show, she tripped while dancing in the aisle, smacked her head on the bench and came up with a whopping knot on the side of her eye.
Trip to first aid scored us a bag of ice, which Olivia held to her head for two minutes and then opened so she could eat the ice out of the bag.
So. Olivia's going to have a big shiner for the last night of VBS...the night where all the parents come and watch the kids sing and dance to the songs they learned all week. Yeah. Score zero for Mommy today.
I watched her like a hawk throughout our playing and caught her striking the "poopy pose" twice. Both times I rushed her to the potty and both times she pooped in the potty. YAY! Much success. Score TWO for Olivia! Although I don't really think you can call her potty trained until she actually initiates the bathroom visit herself. But we're getting there.
We were having so much fun. We did the waterpark, watched a show, did funtown (kiddie section), went to another show. I was going to take her home for nap after show #2 (she's such a huge fan of these shows). Halfway through the show, she tripped while dancing in the aisle, smacked her head on the bench and came up with a whopping knot on the side of her eye.
Trip to first aid scored us a bag of ice, which Olivia held to her head for two minutes and then opened so she could eat the ice out of the bag.
So. Olivia's going to have a big shiner for the last night of VBS...the night where all the parents come and watch the kids sing and dance to the songs they learned all week. Yeah. Score zero for Mommy today.
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
More thoughts on VBS
It seems that my frustration over my very badly-behaved child may have caused me to overestimate her height. In a room of preschoolers, she's taller than about a third. Some of these kids are five years old, and some are almost three, so it's a good range of ages. But she SEEMS taller. Maybe it's her aggressiveness.
Olivia did a lot better on Monday and then not so well again on Tuesday. But I noticed something. While all of the kids were pretty well behaved (except Olivia) on Sunday, at least half of them are pushing each other and melting down by the time we reach the final quarter of the evening on Monday and Tuesday. I guess the newness of the activity kept them all interested on Sunday, but now they've reverted back to their normal, which is that they are all little kids who get overtired and overstimulated and cranky by 7:00 p.m.
Thankfully, a very talented preschool teacher joined our adult leader group on Monday, and she has been AMAZING with the kids. It has helped A LOT.
I'm feeling a little better about Olivia's ability to fit into a crowd. However, it seems that we need to keep the activity going...any lull leads to misbehavior, defiance, and general frustration. So, how to deal with this...?
We were instructed to bring the kids in bathing suits and towels tonight. I'm hoping that a chance to get wet keeps all of the kids interested and engaged for longer tonight. Olivia obviously enjoys Bible School overall. She'd just enjoy it more if I ignored her and let her run off to join the older group for kickball or go back to the craft room to squirt some more glue. Ah, rules, structure, schedules...these things are lost on her.
Olivia did a lot better on Monday and then not so well again on Tuesday. But I noticed something. While all of the kids were pretty well behaved (except Olivia) on Sunday, at least half of them are pushing each other and melting down by the time we reach the final quarter of the evening on Monday and Tuesday. I guess the newness of the activity kept them all interested on Sunday, but now they've reverted back to their normal, which is that they are all little kids who get overtired and overstimulated and cranky by 7:00 p.m.
Thankfully, a very talented preschool teacher joined our adult leader group on Monday, and she has been AMAZING with the kids. It has helped A LOT.
I'm feeling a little better about Olivia's ability to fit into a crowd. However, it seems that we need to keep the activity going...any lull leads to misbehavior, defiance, and general frustration. So, how to deal with this...?
We were instructed to bring the kids in bathing suits and towels tonight. I'm hoping that a chance to get wet keeps all of the kids interested and engaged for longer tonight. Olivia obviously enjoys Bible School overall. She'd just enjoy it more if I ignored her and let her run off to join the older group for kickball or go back to the craft room to squirt some more glue. Ah, rules, structure, schedules...these things are lost on her.
Monday, July 12, 2010
This might kill me
Yesterday evening, Olivia and I attended the first of five vacation Bible school classes. I have made the following observations about this particular program and how my child fits into it.
1. In a room full of three- and four-year-olds, my child (aged 2 years and eight months) is taller than 85%. And heavier. And stronger. And has half the attention span.
2. This VBS program was not designed with three- and four-year-olds in mind. It has five different activities: Crafts, Music, Snack, Games and Story Time. Each age group cycles to a different activity every 20 minutes or so. We found out quickly that, for most activities, 20 minutes was WAY TOO MUCH TIME FOR THIS AGE GROUP. We'd spend 8-10 minutes doing the activity. The remainder of the time we'd either be herding twenty impatient children into a very small classroom to color the same picture AGAIN, or we'd be chasing them down as they tried to run around the building or parking lot. I can understand why there are something like 15 adult volunteers to handle JUST THIS ROOM. Still, it's not quite enough.
3. Our group did the activities in the order listed above. Snack was well timed...right in the middle. But everything else was a little wacky. Especially games and story time. The game started with a demonstration of different types of soil (rocky, weedy, etc) since the lesson for the day was the parable of the sower and seed. But since we hadn't yet heard the lesson in story time, the kids didn't get it and spent all the time plunging their hands into buckets of sand and dirt. And then they were put in two lines to "compete" in a relay race wherein they would each run to each of the four buckets and "plant" (drop) some seeds in, run back and tag the next person on their team. This seemed kind of stupid to me because it was strangely disconnected from the story. Why on earth would I bother putting seeds in this weedy bucket if they aren't going to grow? I wouldn't have blamed any one of those kids if they had run straight to the bucket of potting soil, threw all of their seeds in, and then ran back to their team. Except they wouldn't have done that because none of them knew the point of the story yet.
4. Also, have you TRIED to get three- and four-year-olds to stand still in line and wait their turn? And get them to stand still AGAIN after they get back from their turn. Yeah. It doesn't work so well.
5. And whose bright idea was it to give the youngest group the LAST story time? By the time they finished all of those other activities, they were too fried to pay any attention to the story. I felt sorry for the lady reading and trying to get the kids to focus. And I tried not to laugh at the futile effort as I chased my kid around the parking lot (where story time was held) for the entire duration of the story.
6. Evening wouldn't have been my preference for VBS, at least for this age group. We meet from 5:30 - 8:15 p.m. I know it's more convenient for working parents, but trying to get little ones to work as a group this late in the day? Not so easy.
7. AND!! TWO HOURS AND FORTY-FIVE MINUTES? ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
It was apparent to me, too, that Olivia is more...shall we say, high spirited...than ALL OF THE OTHER KIDS. I'm starting to really think that she may need some help learning to focus before we approach the idea of school. Anyone have any recommendations about how we might go about having her evaluated?
1. In a room full of three- and four-year-olds, my child (aged 2 years and eight months) is taller than 85%. And heavier. And stronger. And has half the attention span.
2. This VBS program was not designed with three- and four-year-olds in mind. It has five different activities: Crafts, Music, Snack, Games and Story Time. Each age group cycles to a different activity every 20 minutes or so. We found out quickly that, for most activities, 20 minutes was WAY TOO MUCH TIME FOR THIS AGE GROUP. We'd spend 8-10 minutes doing the activity. The remainder of the time we'd either be herding twenty impatient children into a very small classroom to color the same picture AGAIN, or we'd be chasing them down as they tried to run around the building or parking lot. I can understand why there are something like 15 adult volunteers to handle JUST THIS ROOM. Still, it's not quite enough.
3. Our group did the activities in the order listed above. Snack was well timed...right in the middle. But everything else was a little wacky. Especially games and story time. The game started with a demonstration of different types of soil (rocky, weedy, etc) since the lesson for the day was the parable of the sower and seed. But since we hadn't yet heard the lesson in story time, the kids didn't get it and spent all the time plunging their hands into buckets of sand and dirt. And then they were put in two lines to "compete" in a relay race wherein they would each run to each of the four buckets and "plant" (drop) some seeds in, run back and tag the next person on their team. This seemed kind of stupid to me because it was strangely disconnected from the story. Why on earth would I bother putting seeds in this weedy bucket if they aren't going to grow? I wouldn't have blamed any one of those kids if they had run straight to the bucket of potting soil, threw all of their seeds in, and then ran back to their team. Except they wouldn't have done that because none of them knew the point of the story yet.
4. Also, have you TRIED to get three- and four-year-olds to stand still in line and wait their turn? And get them to stand still AGAIN after they get back from their turn. Yeah. It doesn't work so well.
5. And whose bright idea was it to give the youngest group the LAST story time? By the time they finished all of those other activities, they were too fried to pay any attention to the story. I felt sorry for the lady reading and trying to get the kids to focus. And I tried not to laugh at the futile effort as I chased my kid around the parking lot (where story time was held) for the entire duration of the story.
6. Evening wouldn't have been my preference for VBS, at least for this age group. We meet from 5:30 - 8:15 p.m. I know it's more convenient for working parents, but trying to get little ones to work as a group this late in the day? Not so easy.
7. AND!! TWO HOURS AND FORTY-FIVE MINUTES? ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
It was apparent to me, too, that Olivia is more...shall we say, high spirited...than ALL OF THE OTHER KIDS. I'm starting to really think that she may need some help learning to focus before we approach the idea of school. Anyone have any recommendations about how we might go about having her evaluated?
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
Two-point-five
1. Olivia slept through the night last night, and the night before. That may not sound like earth-shattering news, but after weeks of putting her back to bed in the middle of the night when she woke up imagining monsters, it seems pretty huge to me. I don't know why she's sleeping better, but I hope it continues.
2. On the other hand, we were out and about last night and driving home after dark, and as soon as the inside of the car turned dark, Olivia started to get scared and talk about monsters. She has never been afraid of the inside of the car before. She seems to be really sensitive to the dark lately.
3. As futile as it has been, we've been trying to convince Olivia that monsters don't exist. This seems a little insincere to me, since I know that monsters DO exist, just not in the form that she imagines. But the monsters that exist in this world are unlikely to be in her bedroom at night. They are more likely to be snatching children in parking lots and grocery stores. At any rate, we've told her that monsters won't go where Jesus is, and she has a crucifix in her room, so she seems to get the concept.
4. I had to dismiss a kid from daycare for next school year. I felt so bad when I told her parents about her problems here and recommended that they find a new place for her to go next year. Unfortunately, I can't figure out how to get her to behave. She's obviously bright and very energetic, but she is also aggressive, defiant and occasionally just mean. Recently, she has been throwing fits at the slightest reprimand and she has gone from hitting and pushing to biting, which I just can't tolerate. By nap time, I'm so frustrated from disciplining her that I'm yelling at everyone for everything and the whole house is full of tension. It's not fair to the other kids, and I don't think it's a healthy environment for the kid in question either. I'm sure there's someone out there who can handle her specific needs, but I've finally come to the conclusion that I'm not that person.
5. That kid is also having a sibling sometime in the fall, and I had to explain that I can't take on a baby right now anyway. Which, I think, came across as confusing to them because we are actively waiting for adoption #2, which will likely show up in the form of a very tiny baby, which is the same thing. But it isn't. Yes, having an infant AND caring for other people's toddlers is a lot of work, and yes, when the time comes it will require a lot of sacrifice of my time and stretch my patience. But I reserve the right to be willing to make sacrifices for a baby who will forever after be a part of our family and NOT make the same sacrifices to care for someone else's child while they work. I don't think that's unreasonable.
6. I am frazzled, disappointed, but most of all RELIEVED about these developments. I don't get paid enough to be this stressed out by one kid.
7. I have just ten more babysitting days (after today) until summer break. Not that I'm counting...
8. Did I mention that Olivia is exactly two-and-a-half years old TODAY?
That's two-and-a-half, going on five. My husband calls this her "Topps baseball card action photo"
2. On the other hand, we were out and about last night and driving home after dark, and as soon as the inside of the car turned dark, Olivia started to get scared and talk about monsters. She has never been afraid of the inside of the car before. She seems to be really sensitive to the dark lately.
3. As futile as it has been, we've been trying to convince Olivia that monsters don't exist. This seems a little insincere to me, since I know that monsters DO exist, just not in the form that she imagines. But the monsters that exist in this world are unlikely to be in her bedroom at night. They are more likely to be snatching children in parking lots and grocery stores. At any rate, we've told her that monsters won't go where Jesus is, and she has a crucifix in her room, so she seems to get the concept.
4. I had to dismiss a kid from daycare for next school year. I felt so bad when I told her parents about her problems here and recommended that they find a new place for her to go next year. Unfortunately, I can't figure out how to get her to behave. She's obviously bright and very energetic, but she is also aggressive, defiant and occasionally just mean. Recently, she has been throwing fits at the slightest reprimand and she has gone from hitting and pushing to biting, which I just can't tolerate. By nap time, I'm so frustrated from disciplining her that I'm yelling at everyone for everything and the whole house is full of tension. It's not fair to the other kids, and I don't think it's a healthy environment for the kid in question either. I'm sure there's someone out there who can handle her specific needs, but I've finally come to the conclusion that I'm not that person.
5. That kid is also having a sibling sometime in the fall, and I had to explain that I can't take on a baby right now anyway. Which, I think, came across as confusing to them because we are actively waiting for adoption #2, which will likely show up in the form of a very tiny baby, which is the same thing. But it isn't. Yes, having an infant AND caring for other people's toddlers is a lot of work, and yes, when the time comes it will require a lot of sacrifice of my time and stretch my patience. But I reserve the right to be willing to make sacrifices for a baby who will forever after be a part of our family and NOT make the same sacrifices to care for someone else's child while they work. I don't think that's unreasonable.
6. I am frazzled, disappointed, but most of all RELIEVED about these developments. I don't get paid enough to be this stressed out by one kid.
7. I have just ten more babysitting days (after today) until summer break. Not that I'm counting...
8. Did I mention that Olivia is exactly two-and-a-half years old TODAY?
That's two-and-a-half, going on five. My husband calls this her "Topps baseball card action photo"
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