Thursday, May 24, 2007

Feeling optimistic

Today is day 2 of my cycle (yes, I had a LONG post-peak phase, but ultimately, I did NOT get pregnant last cycle). For many months, these first couple of days fo the cycle were the worst for me, emotionally. Now that we have a treatment plan with the Clomid (which should progressively help my ovulation get better), it's actually an optimistic time for me. I can look forward to seeing how this cycle progresses and knowing that I have an opportunity to conceive. It's the last week or so of the cycle that's harder now...the waiting...

It always strikes me at this point in my cycle how weird it is that I actually have (or had) endometriosis. I NEVER suspected it before meeting Dr. D. I just didn't have any of the classic symptoms, or so I thought. All the people I'd ever met with endometriosis had these constant bouts with pain.

Now, I wasn't totally pain-free, but my pain always coincided with the start of my period and usually only lasted about 24-36 hours total. Mostly, it is easily managed with Aleve.

But now when I look back, I can see that there were times in my life (college, mostly) when that pain was nearly unmanageable. Sure, it only lasted a day or two, but I remember some very specific instances in college where I spent hours at a time curled up in a ball crying from the pain. And that was after taking 3 pamprin at a time. That medication just made me loopy and didn't help the cramps all that much. I like the aleve much better. Some cycles, I only need one for about 8 hours. Maybe most of my endo lesions (the old ones) were from those college days.

Even so, though, I have almost no other pain throughout my cycle. I guess it just happens that way in some women. Guess I should consider myself one of the lucky ones. Would have been luckier if I never had it at all. But count your blessings, right?

Friday, May 18, 2007

Utterly baffled...

Yesterday, I got a call from my doctor to review the P+7 blood test results, which, if you remember, took place on cycle day 15 to correspond with my VERY early and very short mucus cycle. I was totally sure I got the blood test day totally wrong because I was convinced that clomid screwed up my CM and that I probably didn't ovulate until day 13.

Well, according to the doctor, my hormones were well within the normal for P+7, and my progesterone was 19.3, which is apparently pretty darn good. Dr. D. thought that the clomid did what it is supposed to do and that I should keep the dosage the same next cycle.

However, I was still totally confused. Dialogue as follows:

Me: But I've been spotting for four days now, so it seems that nothing has changed much except my cm.

Doc: Well, the test results are exceptional. You must have just ovulated very early. Where are you in your cycle?

Me: Going by the CM, I'm at P+17.

Doc: Were you using fertility.

Me: Of course.

Doc: Take a pregnancy test. I don't want to get your hopes up, but it's possible that it could do the trick in the first cycle. Call me if you are pregnant. If not, stick with the same plan for next cycle with clomid/mucinex.

Me: Ah, OK...

So of course, I did get my hopes up. I tested this morning (P+18) and got a crushing negative result. Still seeing no obvious signs of either a pregnancy or my period. I've heard that Clomid can push your post-peak phase a little, but it seems overly long now. Since I had a very early peak, I'm still only on cycle day 26 or something, so it's not like I've developed an insanely long cycle, just an insanely long post-peak phase.

I'm trying to be patient, trying to trust God that His timing is better than mine...but it's never very easy to do...

Tuesday, May 15, 2007


So I've been spotting for three days now, so maybe the Clomid didn't "clear up" the second half of the cycle like I'd hoped. We'll see what happens in the next week. Big heavy sigh.

On the bright side, I got to visit with the two cutest little girls and the three most adorable baby boys this weekend. They were a lot of fun.

Friday, May 11, 2007

Well, at least there's this...

I'm still baffled by the mostly-dry cycle I've had so far, but one thing is definitely clear...the introduction of Clomid has, at least, changed the second half of my cycle for the better (at least the charting looks better).

My pattern, for YEARS, has been several days of spotting in the post-peak phase. Whether today is P+11 (as my mucus suggests) or P+6 (as suggested by mittelschmerz pain last Saturday), in a typical cycle, I should have had at least a couple of days of faint spotting by now. So far, I've seen nothing even resembling spotting.

So my hope (as the doc suggested) is that the effect of Clomid on follicular phase has benefitted the luteal phase as well. If this luteal phase is healthier than normal, then maybe it offers more hope for the subsequent follicular phase.

I'm AT LEAST a week away from wasting another pregnancy test (since I don't totally trust my peak day as ovulation). So we'll just have to wait and see...

On a very happy note, I get to visit with ALL of my little nieces and nephews this weekend (ages 3, 2, infant, infant, infant). We'll definitely get our "baby fix" for the weekend, and what fun it is to play with the older ones too!

Tuesday, May 8, 2007

All dried up...

I have no idea what to think.

I was so excited a few days ago when Clomid SEEMED to not be influencing my CM, but it appears that it has after all. I took clomid on cycle days 5-9. Mucus on days 6,7,8. Then NOTHING! Technically, today is Peak plus 8 by my CM discharge, but I had those familiar ovary cramps just three days ago, so I don't know what to think. But I went by the CM anyway and had my P+7 hormone tests done yesterday. So we'll see. If today IS P+8, I'm going to have an insanely short cycle (like 22 days). I'm not even holding out hope of a pregnancy at this point.

So, obviously the Mucinex isn't doing it for me. But the doc probably won't prescribe any antibiotics until another cycle has gone by, to make sure it's absolutely necessary to stimulate CM. Why can't this just be easier?