Thoughts on baby #2

I'm giving a talk on adoption this week, and it has me thinking a lot about the elusive baby #2. It's been on my mind a lot lately, partly because we are thinking about revisiting the FertilityCare world, and partly because Olivia just turned two and we kind of thought we'd have another baby by now. I know, I know. But we didn't have to wait with Olivia, and I guess I'm just impatient.

I've resigned myself to waiting, which isn't so bad except for the fact that we'll have to update our homestudy (and repeat all of the paperwork) in three months if we don't have a placement yet. I figure that God will send us another child on His time and that His timing is perfect.

What I've been thinking about more often now is how comparatively easy babyhood will (likely) be with #2.

If nothing else, this babysitting experience has changed my outlook on crying. When Olivia was a baby, I couldn't stand to hear her cry for long. It took MONTHS to get to the point where I realized that sometimes she just needed to cry and that nothing that I could do would make the crying stop right away. Crying used to raise my blood pressure faster than anything else.

Now, with three loud toddlers running around daily and a baby in my arms, I have a different approach to crying. Sometimes, the baby just has to cry. It's a practical fact of life, especially when it's lunchtime and I need two free hands to get the toddlers fed and cleaned up. Or when I need to change diapers. At these times, if Luke is awake, he is strapped into his bouncy chair and just has to either play alone or cry. Usually, his option is to cry. He's in a stage where he has decided that he will not be happy when he is awake unless he is being held, and that is incompatible with my job demands. I just can't hold him all the time.

So, crying no longer raises my blood pressure. I am amazingly calm through these crying fits. I can confidently mediate toddler conflict and keep everyone fed and clean and safe, despite the crying in the background.

The experience of juggling all the demands of these four children at once has been great training for baby #2. So, when he/she shows up, I'll be ready...at least for the crying and unpredictable demands of an infant. Now, as for the immersion once again into the land of sleep deprivation...well, nothing can really prepare me for that.